When I wrote that title I realized that you could misinterpret it as a bit of an insult. Like, “Whoa, she needs prayer, dude!” But that’s not what I mean. What I actually mean is that probably the best thing you can do for your wife is to pray for her. (Ok, I have already written that the first thing you need to do for your wife is to do whatever it takes to see Jesus. The second thing you need to do is talk to Jesus on behalf of your wife.) And I say pray for her, but I really mean that you should pray in general.
One Man’s Story
I thought I would walk you through what I do, to see if it inspires you. Now, this isn’t the “Right Way” to pray, I’m just going to give you an example of how I pray. If you’d like to share your examples back to me, I would love to learn from you too. Put your comments below!
I do better, in general, when I start my day in prayer. I do not start every day with this prayer time, but that is the goal. Here is what I try to do in my prayer life, including the way that I pray for her specifically.
First, I do a journaling prayer. I have a spiral notebook and I write down the date and then I write a note to God. Just like a little letter to God. What I like about this is that, as a data analyst type of person, I can see my progress and how regularly I am taking time to do this. The act of writing out my prayer also helps me fight off distraction by focusing on the writing.
Next, I have a bunch of Scriptures that I have written out in my journal. I don’t read all of them every morning, but I pick a page and read through them. These have been selected to help me focus on my identity and fight off temptations. I also have a series of Scriptures that focus on seeking God with my whole heart. Next, I pray for people and ministries. I have written a word cloud of people that I pray for, including family, friends, ministries, leaders, and others. I then have a page, and this is really the major point of this blog post, where I pray for my wife. But instead of just praying vague prayers about her, I pray through specific attributes and aspects of her life. I took these categories from Stormie O Martian’s book that is called The Power of a Praying Husband. The topics are her spirit, emotions, motherhood, moods, marriage, submission, relationships, priorities, beauty, sexuality, fears, purpose, trust, protection, desires, work, deliverance, obedience, need, and future. What I do is that on the 1st of the month, I pray for the first topic, on the 2nd I pray for the next topic, and so on through the whole list. That makes it easy. I just look at what day it is, and that’s what I pray for her on that day. I also pray specifically, by name, for her relationships with our kids and our family members and her friends, because relationships are important, and they only work well when the Holy Spirit is leading them. So that’s an important area of prayer.
When it comes to prayer, that’s how I try to start each day. (If I don’t wake up early enough to have that quiet time at home, I usually pray along with John Eldredge’s Daily Prayer on my commute to work. Eyes open, of course. Download the Wild at Heart app so you can have this prayer with you at all times.)
Beginning and End
And then I end each day with prayer. When the lights are out and I’m ready to saw logs, I pray over our home and our family. I pray for our dreams, I pray for all of our kids, our health, and I pray protection over us all as we go to bed. I believe that praying over Dana and praying with Dana is a powerful end to each day.
Prayer is Powerful
I believe that this cadence of prayer sets me up to be the husband that she needs me to be. It hasn’t been something that happened overnight. I have been building on this for our 18.9 years of marriage, as I mature and grow. Are you willing to take a few steps in the right direction? Will your share your ideas with us, so that we can be inspired by your prayer habits? Comment below!
Do you need to know more about how to pray in general? This is the best book about prayer, ever: Moving Mountains by John Eldredge.
Do you want to know more about cultivating a lifestyle of chatting with God all day: Walking with God by John Eldredge.
Do you want to learn more about hearing God’s voice: Frequency by Robert Morris.